No meds, no cry
Seventeen years ago I got a stupid tattoo for an even stupider reason. No one familiar with my competitive streak will be surprised to learn that this tattoo was the result of a high stakes game of Truth of Dare that I refused to lose. And yes, the game involved the cast of Saved by the Bell, but that is a totally different story! Anyway, here I am, half a lifetime later, stuck with an ugly tattoo that embarrasses me at every turn. I particularly hate when, at high level professional meetings, I notice important people staring at it. It almost makes me wish pantyhose were back in style so I could at least blur it a bit.
After years of despising this inkblot on my ankle, I finally decided to get rid of it. This is no easy task. I will need 10-15 treatments, spaced about six weeks apart. It will cost me about $1,000, require frequent doctor's visits and look like hell for a year to a year and half as it gradually fades.
I had heard that tattoo removal is very painful, but was pleased to learn that, with the numbing treatments my doctor uses, the pain would only be about a 6 or 7 on a scale of 1-10. I can live with that. But, unfortunately Riley cannot. During my first appointment I learned that I shouldn't breastfeed for at least several hours -- they don't really know how many -- after being numbed. I pictured my sweet little baby who would be expecting his big dinner when I walked in the door four hours later. I couldn't deprive him of the boob he'd waited all day for any more than I could risk his sickness from ingesting the medication.
Lesson #1: Parenthood is a series of sacrifices one makes for one's child. There was no way I was going to hurt Riley, especially by trying to fix my own stupid mistake. There had to be another way.
I asked how bad the pain would be if I declined the numbing treatment. They asked skeptically, "Do you have a high tolerance for pain?" I sheepishly answered, "Well, I gave birth unmedicated, does that count?" The nurse brightened and noted that I would surely be fine. I wasn't convinced until the treatment started. I channeled all the feelings I had during labor and thought, if it's even a little better than that, I will be OK. The next thing I knew, it was over. I was stunned. I didn't even know they had started in earnest; I thought they were just getting warmed up and then it was over. After a 17-hour labor, the pain from a 2-minute laser treatment felt like a joke! They asked me how the pain was on a scale of 1-10 and I said 4. But in the grand scheme of things, it was nothing.
Lesson #2: My body can do anything! The main reason I decided to try an unmedicated birth is because I wanted to prove to myself that I could tough it out. I've always felt unathletic, uncoordinated, frequently ill and generally pretty physically weak. For once in my life, I wanted to be strong. I wanted to perservere. I wanted to accomplish something challenging with my body. And I did it! Honestly, now I feel like I can do anything.
I didn't realize that my new-found strength would be revealed during tattoo removal, but I'll take it. I am a stronger person than I was before giving birth. And I'm a much stronger person than I was back when I would do anything to win a game of Truth or Dare. I'm sure even my friends Screech and Slater would agree. :)
After years of despising this inkblot on my ankle, I finally decided to get rid of it. This is no easy task. I will need 10-15 treatments, spaced about six weeks apart. It will cost me about $1,000, require frequent doctor's visits and look like hell for a year to a year and half as it gradually fades.
I had heard that tattoo removal is very painful, but was pleased to learn that, with the numbing treatments my doctor uses, the pain would only be about a 6 or 7 on a scale of 1-10. I can live with that. But, unfortunately Riley cannot. During my first appointment I learned that I shouldn't breastfeed for at least several hours -- they don't really know how many -- after being numbed. I pictured my sweet little baby who would be expecting his big dinner when I walked in the door four hours later. I couldn't deprive him of the boob he'd waited all day for any more than I could risk his sickness from ingesting the medication.
Lesson #1: Parenthood is a series of sacrifices one makes for one's child. There was no way I was going to hurt Riley, especially by trying to fix my own stupid mistake. There had to be another way.
I asked how bad the pain would be if I declined the numbing treatment. They asked skeptically, "Do you have a high tolerance for pain?" I sheepishly answered, "Well, I gave birth unmedicated, does that count?" The nurse brightened and noted that I would surely be fine. I wasn't convinced until the treatment started. I channeled all the feelings I had during labor and thought, if it's even a little better than that, I will be OK. The next thing I knew, it was over. I was stunned. I didn't even know they had started in earnest; I thought they were just getting warmed up and then it was over. After a 17-hour labor, the pain from a 2-minute laser treatment felt like a joke! They asked me how the pain was on a scale of 1-10 and I said 4. But in the grand scheme of things, it was nothing.
Lesson #2: My body can do anything! The main reason I decided to try an unmedicated birth is because I wanted to prove to myself that I could tough it out. I've always felt unathletic, uncoordinated, frequently ill and generally pretty physically weak. For once in my life, I wanted to be strong. I wanted to perservere. I wanted to accomplish something challenging with my body. And I did it! Honestly, now I feel like I can do anything.
I didn't realize that my new-found strength would be revealed during tattoo removal, but I'll take it. I am a stronger person than I was before giving birth. And I'm a much stronger person than I was back when I would do anything to win a game of Truth or Dare. I'm sure even my friends Screech and Slater would agree. :)
You are so awsome. I am glad you are taking the plunge. I am not sure I could do it. Wisdom prevails! Mom H
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